Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Part 17, Chapter 8 - Oh Yeah, the Prisoners

Jonnie spends a moment outside next to the dilapidated truck containing the radio batteries and explosive fuses that were traded for two women and a Scotsman. Then he goes over to the captured Brigantes. Yes, even though nary a word was said about them for the past two chapters, seventeen of the grenade-flinging morons survived the ambush to be taken captive by Jonnie's forces. The leader, with eyes "like scummed pools" notices Jonnie.

"Why did you fire on us?" he demanded. It came out as "W'y ja fur awn oos?" English, if you could unscramble it.

That was our courtesy translation, the rest of the Brigante dialogue is nice and authentic.

"Captunk" Arf Moiphy of the "fit'commando, occapaychun fierces, Yarmy of Hauter Zairey" asks if Jonnie's part of the long-promised relief force or the United Nations. Jonnie knows little about either, but Arf is tight-lipped when it's his turn to answer questions, since he "Doan hefta answer nuppin bot name-rank-and-serial-number."

Fortunately, Russians are intimidating, and Moiphy spills that his commander, General Snith, is two days away. The prisoners are searched for weapons and prepared to be bound, but Moiphy asks to "attembt" to his wounded. When Jonnie agrees, the good captain grabs a sturdy club and in seven heavy swings, brains his wounded men. No one is able to interrupt him at any point during this, of course. Afterward, Moiphy extends his hands to be tied and says "Thanunk you." And so the chapter and section ends.

So yeah, that's the Brigantes. African mongrelfolk, degenerate accents, slavers, and a questionable approach to health care, what with the "kill the wounded thing." I'm trying to think of a real-world culture that had similar practices and am drawing a blank. You just can't do that and survive as a people for a thousand years. Like the Psychlos, the Brigantes are gratuitously and unrealistically evil, a society you're supposed to feel good about the heroes annihilating, without actually thinking about how it could possibly operate.

Oh, and apparently the two old ladies that got sold off to the Psychlos were Brigantes, not emissaries from the world government. Thank goodness I clarified my misunderstanding, the story would make no sense otherwise...

Back to Part Seventeen, Chapter Seven


  1. I'm shocked, SHOCKED that L. Ron has a racist portrayal of deepest, darkest Africa!

  2. WHAT in the absolute ruddy fudge it is that accent supposed to BE?! What bizarre mix of accents could have resulted in "Thanunk you"?!